Opening Doors

If you are seeking representation, one of the first things an agent or manager will ask you is "What casting directors do you know?" If you have representation, you're going to be asked about how you are building on those relationships and what new casting directors are you meeting.

We're opening doors,

Singing, "Look who's here!"
Beginning to sail on a dime.
That faraway shore's 
Getting very near!
We haven's a thing to fear ---
We haven't got time!*

Of course, we all have that movie fantasy that we will be seen on stage, in an audition or more and more now, on youtube, but the reality is that you need to get out there and do some work. We are lucky here in the U.S. that there are open calls for lots of non-union (however hellish those calls can be) theatres. They exist and you can show up and be seen. There are also E.P.A.s (Equity Principal Auditions) and E.C.C.s (Equity Chorus Calls) and, although casting from the E.P.A.s and E.C.C.s is often not the norm, there is still a chance.  Even if you're non-union:
(With So Little to be Sure of) and even if you might not get seen:(Merrily We Roll Along) (...roll along, following dreams), it is ALWAYS worth turning up.

But we are sometimes seen. And those 2 minutes (if you're lucky) in the room are not always enough for a casting director to give you a job or even remember you. And let's face it, we have all had those 2 minutes in the room when we bomb and wish we had not shown up at all. 

They're slamming the doors,

Singing, "Go away!"

It's less of a sail than a climb.

That faraway shore's

Farther every day.

We're learning to ricochet.

We still have a lot to say...*

No matter how many times I am rejected, I still have a lot to say! You are in for so much rejection and you have to accept that or you are not going to survive in this business. Before acting full time, I was a teacher and I got almost every job I applied for. That is certainly not the norm in acting. Looking for jobs and going to auditions does not equal getting a job! It is the norm NOT to book the job. But every audition is a chance to meet a new casting director or remind a familiar one about you and your work.Chances are that you are not going to be plucked from obscurity and rise to fame. So how can you help yourself?

Brette Goldstein chatting about casting. She knows her stuff!

We're opening doors,

SInging, "Here we are!"

We're filling up days on a dime.

That faraway shore's 

Looking not too far.

We're following every star  ---

There's not enough time!*

All of this takes a lot of time. But it is our job. It is part of being an actor. And often we think that when we have an agent or a manger, s(he) will do it all for us. Not true. I happen to be lucky enough to have a wonderful manager, Kathy Olsen: Encompass Arts, and I know she is looking, submitting and fighting for me every day. But we are a team. I have to do my share. She can tell a casting director that I am wonderful, but it will be better for all of us if that casting director has met me. There lies the position of strength (or weakness if I bombed the audition, but let's not dwell on that!).

So, do your share. There are many actors of the old school who are appalled that we pay to meet casting directors. But it is a reality of the business today and when you meet the good ones, not only is it worth meeting them, you are paying to learn something from them too. I am not a Pollyanna (despite my name) and I know there are times when you feel it has been a waste of time or you go to an E.P.A. to perform a monologue for an intern examining his navel. BUT, you take the risks and you have to be in the game. And you do not know where that intern is going next. There is no point bitching and complaining. Do something. Meet casting directors: 

• Pay for classes and meetings at many of the places offering opportunities: The Network, One on One (audition required to join), Backstage University, Actors' Connection, Stagelighter (video or written feedback), Actor's Green Room, The Actors' Loft. There are others too, I am sure and feel free to add in the comments. I go to The Network more than anywhere else. It was the first place I went when I was still a student and I met Paul Michael when he was just opening it and I loved him. So out of loyalty and many good experiences, that is where I go. I have heard good reports from the others too. I suspect that the bottom line is that if a casting director likes you at a meeting, s(he) is not going to make a judgement based on where you met. And yes, the above is going to cost you a few bucks but there are special deals and it is well worth it if you are willing to put in the time and effort.  
• Meals for Monologues (a wonderful FREE event where casting directors give up their time to see actors perform a song or monologue in exchange for donations of food for the homeless.) Last year the lovely Joy Dewing organised an open call and there was another one at Telsey (Tara Rubin herself was in one of the rooms!) There is another one coming up in February. Go!
• Audition update/Backstage University's meet-up. (the next one is on February 5th). This is not strictly speaking free. You buy a ticket. BUT, the way I look at it is, it is a night of socialising with other actors, a chance to meet a casting director and manager or agent and it's an open bar. So, although my ticket cost me $20, I drank enough Sauvignon Blanc and met enough people and had enough fun to make me feel as if I made a profit on that money! And now Tom Lapke's going to pay me for that mention and I'll be in clover.
• Go to the the theatre! Of course, this is not always free but there are many comps if you look and pay attention. And keep an eye on who is casting things. See things that are cast by C.D.s you like and want to meet.
• Send thank you notes, postcards, etc.  Keep in touch (but do not stalk them!) Follow casting directors blogs, their twitter, facebook, etc. (as appropriate i.e. follow but do not poke!). Learn when you meet casting directors what they prefer. Some hate email, others prefer it. Do your homework.
• Keep note of every audition and meeting. I have notebooks with dates and notes and have now discovered the wonder of Casting About: an online record of who is casting what and the option to keep your own personal notes for each C.D.
• I've said it before and I'll say it again: go to auditions!

All of the above seems so simple but often we need reminded. I'd like to share a couple of anecdotes about why and how I think I was lucky enough to be in those situations. In short, I followed the above list.

I first met Judy Bowman at The Network. I liked her immediately and I was able to mention the name of a friend I had worked with whom I knew Judy liked. I then went to see a play Judy had cast at the Mint and when she called me in to audition for a short film, I was able to talk about how much I had enjoyed the pIay. I have kept in touch with postcards or emails (not too many)!  Brette Goldstein (see above video) offers great advice to treat the relationship like dating. We do not want to seem too desperate. Just be sensible and a real person! Don't send emails or postcards if you have nothing to say. And do not add them as a friend on facebook unless you really have a relationship with them.  Katja Blichfeld offered similar advice and was so spot on about being a real person and not going to meet the same casting director every week at networking events. They can smell the desperation and you have to trust that they are good at their job and will remember you. Lucky me that it took one meeting (this is NOT the norm). I met Camille Hickman briefly at The Network and over a year and half later she recommended me to a colleague for a role. Thank you.

Michael Cassara seems to know everybody! He is clearly very, very good at his job. I first met him when my friend Jean Ann Garrish invited me to his birthday drinks. Then NYMF open call, Meals for Monologues and an E.P.A. (by this meeting, I was confident that he remembered me). A couple of months ago, I had a missed call one Saturday night from Michael (that's how hard he works) inviting me to audition for a project he was casting.  I said "I didn't submit." He said "I know, but I thought of you." This is a man who knows his client and knows the actors to call in.

Wise Words from Michael Cassara. The video is a couple of years old but the advice is still relevant.

I first met Holly Buczek when she was working with Michael Cassara (an E.P.A.). Then she called me in for a job I submitted for on Actors' Access. I met her again at Meals for Monologues and then at Audition Update's meet and greet (when certain actors thought I was Joy Dewing, but that's another story). Holly remembered me (and my friend Vanessa Spica who has been called back by Holly before) so we chatted and had a glass of wine. She is definitely NOT A BITCH (all actors should get this inside joke). I also bumped into her on the 42 crosstown bus (but that is not really something you can pursue as with the other examples above!).  A few weeks ago, I returned to New York after a visit to Scotland for the holidays and I saw Holly on facebook looking for a reader for her callbacks (for Joy Dewing Casting) the following day. I offered my services but she already had someone. Then the morning of the callbacks she sent me a lovely message asking me to come in that day to be seen. Again, I had not submitted, but I had come to her mind as being right for the project when I offered to be a reader. I went on to book the job.

We're banging on doors, 

Shouting, "Here again!"

We're risking it all on a dime.

That faraway shore's looking near again.

The only thing left is when,

We know we should count to ten ---*

I'm counting. I'm opening doors. Look who's here!

* Opening Doors from "Merrily We Roll Along"
Music and lyrics by Stephen Sondheim (as per)

www.pollymckie.com
www.theactorsfriend.com

And Still You're Grateful

You're always sorry,
You're always grateful,
You're always wondering what might have been.
Then she walks in.

And still you're sorry,
And still you're grateful,
And still you wonder and still you doubt.
And she goes out.*

(The "she" in this is referring to the men's wives. It is something different for me. It can be something different for you too. The genius of Sondheim's lyrics. Interpret as you see fit, dear reader.)



Thanksgiving is a holiday I have fully embraced since first moving to the U.S. 5 years ago. I love the sentiment, I love the invitations, I love the people and I love the food! It's like Christmas without the stress.

First attempt cooking for Thanksgiving in NYC, 2009.

What I love most is the fact that people take time to reflect on what they are thankful for. Something we should be doing daily. And, in this business, it is certainly something that helps our sanity. A time to reflect regularly about what we have that we should be grateful for.

As I get older, I realise that so many of the things that I felt sorry, sad and regretful about are the things that I realise now were the right things for me. Things that happened for a reason. Even if I could not see it at the time.

In no particular order, I am grateful for:

1.  The fact that I am unwell right now. I have inflammation of the lungs so am at home resting and have time to write this blog just in time for Thanksgiving.

2.  Not going to drama school when I was 22.  When I was in my final year of high school, I played Meg Brockie in "Brigadoon" and then sang in an end of year concert.  And that last month of school planted the seed that I might actually be able to pursue acting as a career.  It had not been a serious option before.  But I had two wonderful teachers who saw something special in me and even my father paid me a compliment, so I knew it must be serious.  I went to University, as planned and studied for my MA in Philosophy and Theatre with the aim of going to drama school in London when I graduated. I fluffed one audition and had fallen in love so did not even apply to any other schools. Love and youth. Spent my twenties regretting it and now I am so very grateful! My thirties are so much better.

Everything's different,
Nothing's changed,
Only maybe slightly
Rearranged.*

3.  So many wonderful teachers. Teachers who have challenged me. Teachers who have become my friends. So many wonderful students.  Students who have challenged me. Students who have taught me. Students who have become my friends.

Bermuda High School trip to NYC

Recording radio shows with ACTeen Juniors

4.  Having my heart broken. The material I have been able to use in my acting work is endless. There was one man in particular that I thought I would spend the rest of my life mourning. Now I realise that it would have been a disaster if we had stayed together. I thank God every day that I did not marry him.

You don't live for her,

You do live with her,

You're scared she's starting to drift away  

And scared she'll stay.*

5.  Netflix.  Cable became so expensive and I, like so many actors, am broke.  So I cancelled it.  Netflix is wonderful. And I am watching some excellent stuff (most recently "Breaking Bad") instead of lying on the couch in a coma watching some reality crap on cable.  Watching good acting and feeling inspired.

6.  Clinical depression. I have battled with depression for years. I am grateful for it and the challenges it brings. And, as ever, how it helps with the actor's homework. I do not trust people who are happy all the time!

You're sorry-grateful,

Regretful-Happy.

Why look for answers where none occur?*

7.  Being Scottish!

Dancing a Gay Gordon's at The Caledonian Ball in Bermuda.

I have several issues with being Scottish here and working as an alien. There are challenges in addition to the normal challenges American actors face. I am not allowed to join Equity here and have had to turn down work as a result. But, I look at the positive. It makes me stronger and more determined. Besides, being Scottish is pure dead brilliant!

8.  Not getting jobs after auditions. Before acting, I got every job I applied and interviewed for. I did not really understand failure properly (well, apart from getting 42% on my second year Physics exam.) Of course, when I first starting auditioning and getting callbacks, I prayed for a big break that would get me my dream job. But it did not happen. I am grateful for that. I understand the day in/day out process of auditioning and  have realised thanks to some of those wonderful teachers mentioned in 3 and my wonderful new manager Kathy Olsen of Encompass Arts that, I can give a wonderful audition and not get the part. There is so much more to casting than that (that's for another blog). But the preparation and the going out there is what matters and learning that the job is not mine is making me stronger and a better actor. Fairly recently I auditioned for one of my longtime dream roles and I did not book the gig. Of course, I was upset, but now I realise, that if I had booked the job, I would not have been able to be doing what I am loving every Monday night at The Cafe at Broadway.  (now Polly's Follies)

There are so many more things to be thankful for but I do not want to go on forever. Perhaps I'll revisit them next Thanksgiving.  

I must end the list, however, with the best. 

9.  I could not be doing any of this if it were not for these  grown-ups in my life...

My family:
Back row: Dad, my sister, Jane, brother, Andrew, Mum
Front: brother, David, me, brother Johnnie
Foreground: back of a nephew's head!

10.  ...and these wonderful little people:

Nieces and nephews:
Back row: Nancy, Molly, Flora, Tess (on my knee), Hector, Jimmy, Charlie
Front: Tom, Jock and George

*Sorry-Grateful from "Company" 
Music and lyrics by Stephen Sondheim (for whom I am also eternally grateful)

www.pollymckie.com

Getting it together is the whole trick!

Here's a little story
That should make you cry
About two unhappy dames.
Let us call them Lucy X and Jessie Y,
Which are not their real names.
Now Lucy has the purity
Along with the unsurety
That comes with being only twenty-one.
Jessie has maturity
And plenty of security
Whatever you can do with them she's done.*

I am Lucy and Jessie, and Polly and Mary, with a touch of a few other dames (certainly my mother) thrown in for good measure.  And how do we show that versatility to casting directors while staying true to what we keep hearing they want: the real YOU. The reality is that these women are all the real me.  It's about choosing what to show and when.

Just when I am finally getting around to getting my reel edited, it seems that might be obselete now.  Everything in this business moves fast. And, if you are looking for work (let's face it, most actors are) then you need to be in the race.

Most actors I know use Actors' Access to submit. And I know I always wondered about how to get noticed.  There is a very simple pecking order if you want to be at the top of the virtual pile.


The pile from top to bottom

1. Actors with headshot, slate and video clip (for so long I thought it had to be a full reel, but it can be any short clip  -  even better actually as you'll see if you read on.)
2. Actors with headshot and video clip (no slate).
3. Actors with headshot and slate.
4. Actors with headshot only.


I recently attended a seminar held by the lovely folks at Actors' Access.  Anything to keep in the loop and up to speed.  And, of course, I always share what I learned.  There were many depressing facts that could make one just want to give up.  We watched a live version of how the submissions work.  Within an hour of a job being posted there were THOUSANDS of submissions.  And the reality is that a casting director will call in around 20 people for the role.

So what can we do to help ourselves? Easy. Look at the list above and if you do not have a manager or agent, there is still so much you can do to help yourself.  Just give the casting directors what they want. Or at least try!

1. Headshot (still the king - or queen - of submissions)
2. A slate (a new addition to Actors Access)
3. A reel (although, that is becoming less important. Number 4 is taking over)
4. Short, specific clips. (more specifics on the specifics later).
5. Cover note: short, sweet and, above all, to the point.

And herein lies one of our major problems.  and it is so hard, as an actor, to step away from the trap.  We want to show EVERYTHING.  If I submit a short clip of a great dramatic scene, how are they going to know how funny I am?  The wonderful Heidi Marshall explains this problem: At Ease, Actors.

Given their advantages,
You may ask why
The two ladies have such grief
This is my belief
In brief:
Lucy is juicy
But terribly drab.
Jessie is dressy
But cold as a slab.
Lucy wants to be dressy
Jessie wants to be juicy.
Lucy wants to be Jessie
And Jessie, Lucy.*

So, given our own advantages, what can we do?  Let's go back to the list.  Headshot. Simple.  It should look like you and be recent.  Latest advice is that it should be no more than two years old. There is plenty of advice on this without me going on. Let's get to the new thing: the slate. Simple, clear. Do not try to be clever or fancy. Just state your name clearly. The way it is set up on Actors' Access is that when a C.D. clicks on your headshot, it comes to life with your slate: almost like a talking headshot. It may seem silly but you'd be amazed how much one can see from a simple slate.It is free to upload one take (under 7 seconds).  A second slate is $5 to upload.  And here's the best news: your submission is automatically higher up the list than actors without slates. The following was taped after I heard about the slate and I rushed to my go to on camera wizard, Heidi Marshall (I think I may have mentioned her before...just once or twice!) and recorded the following.  Obviously, this is before editing for final slate, but it's amazing what you can tell about me just from this little clip.  

Poor sad souls,
Itching to be switching roles.
Lucy wants to do what Jessie does,
Jessie wants to be what Lucy was.

One of the reasons I love acting so much is that I can switch roles.  I can explore all the sides of me.  And a good reel will show that.  But, here is the problem.  Casting Directors simply do not have the time to watch every actor's reel. And in my research for trying to get my own reel done (thanks to a wonderful friend helping me out), I have been watching other actors' reels and frankly, I quit watching most of them after about 30 seconds.  The ones that capture my attention, I might give a minute or two.  If I do not have time to watch them while I am specifically researching reels, how do you think C.D.s feel about the prospect of watching thousands of them to cast one role? 

So this takes us to number 4 on the list.  I had always felt resigned to the fact that I would be on the bottom of the list of submissions on Actors access, unless it was a role that my manager had submitted for me (agent and manager submission still get more attention from C.D.s).  But there is hope, unrepresented actors. Do yourselves a favour! Stop worrying about the reel and showing everything.  Sometimes, we have a great clip but not enough for a good reel.  And without worrying about showing every side of ourselves, every skill, we should just focus on the task at hand.  Specificity helps the casting directors. I had already taken Heidi's advice and posted specific short clips on my website.  And now I know it's what casting directors want and I can post them on Actors' Access.  So when you are submitting for a job, you do not need to worry about showing everything. Just be specific.

Lucy's a lassie
You pat on the head.
Jessie is classy
But virtually dead.
Lucy wants to be classy.
Jessie wants to be Lassie.
If Lucy and Jessie could only combine,
I could tell you someone
Who could finally feel just fine!*

At the seminar, Blair Hickey (actor and co-founder of the wonderful Casting About) told a story about being called in for an audition based solely on the DESCRIPTION of a short clip.  The common thread is that Casting Directors are busy and they want you to be right for the role.  And they can tell so much from so little.  They are seasoned experts and you'd be amazed what a simple slate can tell you.  Watch them.  Pay attention to other actors:  in your classes, in holding rooms. We all make instant judgments on people. Save the casting directors time.  Even if you have an amazing reel, post BRIEF and SPECIFIC clips with descriptions (e.g. White collar professional: procedural interview). This also pertains to number 5: short and to the point cover note.  I used to think I needed to follow my good old-fashioned letter writing skills. Do not waste your time or the C.D.'s time. If the notice calls for Spanish speaking, under 5ft 3 and able to play the piano, the note should read "Spanish-speaking, 5ft 2, proficient pianist." If you spend time writing "Dear Mr. so and so, I was so thrilled to read about this project and would be delighted if you would..." well, they stopped reading long before I got to the elipsis.


Casting directors are very busy people.  They want the right person for the job and they want him or her quickly. I have heard from some casting directors not to use clips from class, but, what can you lose, really?  Of course, we would all love Meryl Streep's reel, but the reality is that, if you're an emerging artist, you are scrambling to get footage from short films you have done and if you have a great clip right now that shows you could play a battered wife or a diligent nurse and it's from a class, USE it.  

Have a website, post a reel, post a slate, post clips, be specific, make it clear and simple. Submit.  

So, let's do ourselves a favour.  Do it all.  Why not?

Tell 'em that they ought to get together quick.
'Cause getting it together is the whole trick!
Yeah!*

* The Story of Lucy and Jessie from "Follies"
Music and Lyrics by Stephen Sondheim.

www.pollymckie.com
www.theactorsfriend.com

Let Me Entertain You

When my friend, Sophie Yaeger, first told me about this exciting new venue, 
The Cafe at Broadway, I was thrilled. I was excited for Sophie and her future. 

The Cafe at Broadway
917 287 2392

I went to see the new space and saw the potential, possibilities and, above all, Sophie's passion for the place. Then she asked me to be the hostess for their new Monday Broadway style open mic. I was flattered, excited and absolutely terrified!

I saw the empty room.  It's a lovely room, as you can see.  I saw the blank canvas.  And, of course (as you can tell from my previous blogs) I immediately starting quoting Sondheim.  White: a blank page or canvas.  His favorite  -  so many possibilities.*

The Cafe at Broadway
917 287 2392

For me it was dark: a blank stage or platform.  Her favourite  -  so many possibilities.  That feeling of adrenalin when we see a space to perform. 

I don't need a lot,
Only what I got,
Plus a tube of greasepaint and a follow-spot!^

But, wait.  I DO need a lot!  A script, a director, homework, a costume, rehearsal. Sophie wanted me to be me. And that's the most terrifying thing of all. No rehearsal. No plan. No idea who would be in the audience. No idea what they would sing. No idea why Sophie asked me. 

People laughed at my insecurity: "But you're so good at stuff like this.". Really? How do you know? I don't. So I realised that I would have to fall back on the lifetime of training I had being part of the McKie family. I come from a family of talkers. Well, my father does not talk much when my mother is around (as you can read here) but he is more than capable (as you can hear here).
Public speaking, debating, after-dinner speaking, reciting poetry, singing parodies, performing at parties were all part of normal life as I was growing up.  Both my parents are teachers and I was (and still am, but not full time) a teacher. It is something in one's soul. My sister is a teacher too. A brilliant one. One brother is a lawyer and the other two are writers. All five of us learned poetry and had to make speeches in public.  It was the norm in our education. My middle brother, Johnnie, is the quietest of us all and the only one out of the five of us who did not debate at University. He was, and is, however, the great deliverer of one-liners and comebacks that will have everyone laughing. That's a gift. And he proved he can make a magnificent speech (as best man at my eldest brother's wedding and as groom, obviously, at his own). My natural instinct and familial and cultural training is to insult the crowd. In Scotland, that's a compliment.  But I feared this was not going to be my friend.  I also feared that nature would kick in and that is what I would do.  I did, of course. Sorry, Vanessa Spica!

Photo by Daniel Yaeger

Hello, everybody! My name is Polly.
What's yours?

Let me entertain you,
Let me make you smile.
Let me do a few tricks,
Some old and then some new tricks,
I'm very versatile!+

Singing a little Gilbert and Sullivan parody
for our parents' Ruby Anniversary

I started to realise that I did have the experience and years of training. I had done the homework. What is hosting? I have been thinking and realise it is not really very different from all the other things that are second nature to me.

Banter (the McKie family), being able to hurl insults and take the heckling in return (again, the McKie family), 

Singing for our father's 70th birthday party
(and encouraging the next generation along the way).

getting up to sing and entertain, even if the crowd is small and you don't want to 
(yet again, the McKie family) making the audience feel loved, wanted, amused and itching to get up and show their stuff (just what I want to do for my classes when I teach) and winging it (well, that's the story of my life).




But let me make it clear, that is not enough. This is the venue that helped me to be myself and relax enough to do my job. Well, to be honest, I was never relaxed and was a nervous wreck throughout, but the crowd (small though it was) did not see that. The Cafe at Broadway has devised the most welcoming open mic in the city. There is NO COVER charge and not only is there no minimum, they even have half price drinks all night for the open mic on Mondays!  They have lighting, sound, a glorious grand piano and cheap booze! What's not to love. The people who were there were wonderful.  I am grateful to all of them. It is a warm, friendly, supportive place. Come and sing or listen or drink or laugh or clap or meet new people or, do what I plan to do: all of it! See you on Monday.

And if you're real good,

I'll make you feel good  ---

I want your spirits to climb.

So let me entertain you,

And we'll have a real good time,

Yes, sir!

We'll have a real good time!+

               

 * "Sunday in the Park with George" by Stephen Sondheim
 ^ "Broadway Baby" from Follies by Stephen Sondheim
 + "Baby June and Her Newsboys" from Gypsy: Lyrics by Stephen Sondheim

www.pollymckie.com

Perpetual Anticipation

Perpetual anticipation
Is good for the soul
But it's bad for 
The heart.*



This weekend I drank the bottle of fizz that my friend, Jean Ann Garrish, gave me for my birthday back in April.  I had explained to her that, in the past, I always had a bottle of champagne in my fridge so that I would be ready to celebrate but that, in recent years, I had neglected the habit.  So she gave me a bottle to remind me.  My sister and her husband drink fizz in times of trouble.  As Napoleon said "Champagne: in victory you deserve it. In defeat, you need it!"

It has been one of those weeks.  Victory and defeat.  And waiting.


It's very good for
Practicing self-control.
It's very good for
Morals, but
Bad for morale.*

Being an actor means a whole lot of waiting.  Waiting to be seen at E.P.A. (a whole different level of waiting for the non-union, as discussed in Merrily We Roll Along, and ...roll along, following dreams.); waiting for an appointment after submitting; waiting for your agent to call, waiting for a cmail (not a typo  - an actors' access reference), waiting to hear about a callback, waiting for a job offer, waiting in the wings, waiting for the next season of "Orange is the New Black" on Netflix.

This week has been a week of waiting.


Well, of course, much more than this week!  I have waited since childhood to start following my dream.  Several false starts and deciding to take the plunge in my thirties (Growing Up).


So many status updates on facebook read "I nailed my audition"  "Callback: woot, woot".  What does that even mean?  I am betting 90% of them do not book the job (not based on any scientific facts!)  Actors do not come out thinking they nailed the audition.  Or is that just me?  I ALWAYS think I could have done more, done better, done more and better.  But I do know that I did an acceptable job at this particular audition.  I did my work.  They liked me.  I rarely feel that but sometimes you just know.  And this is a role I want to play.  A job I really wanted.  

And so the waiting started. 

Perpetual anticipation's a
Delicate art:
Playing a role,
Aching to start,
Keeping control
While falling apart.

Perpetual anticipation
Is good for the soul
But it's bad for 
The heart.*

This is when my 'phone becomes an issue.  Did I miss a call?  Double checking. Triple checking.  Posting on Callback Corner on Audition Update.  Going on the subway and praying for a voicemail when you come back up out of the ground.  

Well, after four long days, the waiting was over.  I did not book the job.  At least my waiting was put to an end.  The director was lovely enough to email me and tell me how much they liked my work. That's a rare thing. When I was called back for Mrs. Brill in Mary Poppins, the call came over two months after my first audition.  Four days is nothing.  Even if it seemed like an eternity at the time.

So, that was my defeat.  That accounted for half of the bottle of fizz. 

I have been lucky enough to be in email touch with a wonderful manager.  After several emails and attempts to find time, we finally met last week.  I knew in my gut from the emails that I liked her.  And I was right.  She's even better in person!  Thank you, Kathy Olsen and Encompass Arts!

Now, I'd better go out to Sussex Wines and buy a new bottle of champagne to keep in the fridge so I am ready for the next victory.  Ready to do some more waiting...and grateful for it all.

*Perpetual Anticipation from "A Little Night Music": Stephen Sondheim, of course.

www.pollymckie.com

You Gotta Have a Gimmick

Do something special
Anything that's fresh'll
Earn you a big fat cigar.
You're more than just a mimic
When you got a gimmick -
Take a look how different we are! *


We are all special.  Well, that's what the parents and teachers tell us in childhood (and therapists and self-help books in adulthood).  In Scotland, mostly you are told not to get ideas above your station and never to bum yer load (toot your own horn). And never to split an infinitive (I suspect that was just my parents).

I think most actors (working or resting) have daily/weekly/monthly (the regularity might depend on the regularity of jobs) doubts about themselves.  We go back and forth with that feeling of worthlessness, not knowing what to do, feeling inadequate and then that other side of what we really know, deep in our soul: we have something special.  If we did not believe that in some part of us (even if we hide it well), how could we survive?
So, here I am in America.  Land of the brave and free.  One of the reasons I chose to come to study here in the states was that self-belief that seemed to ensue.  I have a love/hate relationship with it.  Torn between never wanting to seem big-headed but dealing with the knowledge that I am fantastic.  I also like the idea of coming somewhere new.  Much as I love Cheers, I liked the idea of going somewhere where no one knew my name.  I had the freedom to try and fail.  Try and succeed. I am Polly McKie.  Not somebody's daughter.  Not somebody's wee sister.  Boy, I miss my family. But thanks to Skype and Metro PCS, I am still wee P.  The runt of the litter of a wonderful family.


We strive for the perfect headshot, perfect song, perfect monologue.  And what makes it perfect?  We hear in classes, in workshops, from casting directors, agents, at auditions, "bring YOU".  Sometimes I think I'd rather bring my mother to the audition than just ME.  She could sell me better.  It's always easier to have someone else sing one's praises.  

You can pull all the stops out
Till they call the cops out;
Grind your behind till you're banned.
But you gotta get a gimmick
If you wanna get a hand. *

They have not called the cops out for me yet.  But I do have to deal with immigration issues.  (details of all of that to follow in another blog, for fear that this entry may go on ad infinitum).  After approval here, I had to visit the U.S. Embassy in London.  After the first interview, I was ushered to another room and the nice lady asked me, "So, what makes you extraordinary?" Surely that is not my question to answer?  That is why I had all those letters from others. I was raised that it is not my place to say that I am great. So I stood there.  I hummed and hawed and said some things about what other people had said.  It's all a bit of a blur.  I remembered, though, what I said at the end of my awkward waffle, "People seem to think that I am funny.".  The nice lady behind the desk smiled and said "Yes, I can see that.  Your visa is approved."

Now I approach the difficulties of trying to get a green card.  I could extend my O1 visa but there are limitations  (that's another blog I'm not brave enough to write, but my mother is ready to write to Obama!).  My biggest breaks for auditions have been by word of mouth.  My favourite.  Someone else saying I can do the job.  So much easier than pushing ourselves forward.

Most days I think, "I messed that up. I do not know what I am doing. I have so much to learn." 

Today I choose to say that I am special.

I am Polly McKie.

I'm electrifying
And I ain't even trying. *


*You Gotta Have a Gimmick from Gypsy: Lyrics by Stephen Sondheim (as per)

www.pollymckie.com

Look at Me! Look at Me!

Look at me!  Look at me!  Look at me...*

That is my life.  Look at me.  Oh, and could you like me too?  And, even better, could you give me a job?

I go to E.P.A.s.  Sometimes I am seen, sometimes I am not. 
(Merrily We Roll Along) 
Sometimes there is just one person behind the table.
(With So Little to be Sure of)

We have all been at those auditions where the young intern behind the table seems to be examining her navel, rather than looking at us:

Lady, look at me, look at me miss, oh
Look at me, please, oh
Favor me, favor me with your glance.*

Or it could be a an important producer examining his navel:

Say, Mister producer,  
I'm talkin' to you, sir.^

That does not mean these auditions are a waste of time.  I hear so many actors complaining when they feel that the important people are not in the room.  Or feeling that the important people behind the table are not paying attention.  Of course, there are horror stories about the casting director texting, etc., etc.  BUT, we have to show up.  We have to keep going.  There are audience members who text during Broadway shows.  Stop being bitter and complaining and consider it part of your training.

Nowadays, though,it is not enough just to show up.  It is expected that actors have an online presence. A website, a reel (still a work in progress for me), Facebook, twitter and so on.  Now I know very successful actors who have none of this.  I was excited when I received my first IMDB credit (thanks to The Austin Pendleton Project) and then went to add my photo to the page.  I was told I needed to pay an annual fee for that privilege (same goes for adding bio, trivia, etc.) Meryl Streep does not have to pay to upload her headshot and resume on IMDB (I'm assuming!)  Not Miss Streep's fault, of course!  For the record, I love her.

And therein lies one of the major problems.  Emerging artists are the ones who really need the help: managers and agents to sell them because this is the point in the career where that stuff is harder.  I am guessing Judi Dench does not have a website and is not doing student films to get stuff for her reel.  She does not have to pay for an event at the Network or One on One to meet a casting director.  Nor should she have to!  She is Judi Dench.  Goddess.

But we do.  And I do.  

What do you, what do you see off 
There in those trees, oh
Won't you give, won't you give me a chance? *

Again, what's the use of complaining about the person behind the table looking out of the window?  There is little we can do.  And we also have to trust that they know.  Sit on the other side of the table if you ever have the chance.  It's a revelation.  We have to embrace the way the business is now and do what we can.  No one is going to discover us sitting in a small cafe in Greenwich village.  There are all these wonderful showbiz stories of being discovered on Youtube etc. (Telsey and Co. have even started a department especially for looking at YouTube videos).  I have not sent a video to Telsey yet.  Maybe I'll be satisfied with one of them in another 10 years or so.  We all know someone who got a big break.  Who got lucky (although for most, there is hard work in the background somewhere  -  I prefer not to focus on the ones who are pure luck and not talent).  And, of course, I dream of someone seeing my talent without me actually having to DO anything (certainly not the self-promotion stuff).

Say, Mr. Producer,
Some girls get the breaks.
Just give me my cue, sir.
I've got what it takes. ^
(lyric appears in music book "All Sondheim: Volume 1" (the yellow book), but I have yet to see or hear it anywhere else.  I like it!)

I have been told over and over again that I've got what it takes.  It is not enough.  I made some half-baked attempts at self-promotion.  Even posing for a headshot is painful for me.  And then I took a life-changing class with Heidi Marshall.  Not only is she a casting director and director, she is the most actor friendly teacher I have met.  She tweets, she posts casting notices, she has a facebook page for actor headshots and websites to help us be seen, she recommends actors to other casting directors, she understands the fragile egos we have, she blogs.

In many ways I have extra struggles being an immigrant.  I realise, though, how lucky I am that I was forced to delve into the world of self-promotion, like it or not.  I do not like it.


Say, Mister producer,  
I'm talkin' to you, sir.
I don't need a lot,
Only what I got,
Plus a tube of grease-paint and a follow spot! ^

...plus a twitter account, a facebook page, a profile on NY Castings, actors access, YouTube, a website, a reel (still waiting for more footage!), IMDB...

Paul Russell just wrote about the whole thing in this week's Backstage:


"How to Audition and Get Cast in Your Sleep"  Although I still got a lot of work to do and all the online media robs me of my sleep  -  I still love the article, Mr. Russell!)


So here I go on the self-promotion bandwagon.  Website, facebook actress page, postcards, twitter (which, as my brother - who has still to write my bio for IMDB because I think he'll do a better job than I can - points out, I'm not much cop at).  I've got work to do.  But I'm trying.

(See - crappy cell phone shot of new postcards from Twitter: my brother is right!)

I've been told I should have been born in a different era.  Born in another decade, I would be working more.  But I was born when I was born.  I am Polly McKie, runt of the litter and I've got what it takes:

Look at me.

www.pollymckie.com

* "Ah Miss" from "Sweeney Todd". Stephen Sondheim. 
^ "Broadway Baby" from "Follies". Stephen Sondheim.